11 June, 2011

I'm late today because I was fixing my bike.

Was up at 0530CDT for not reason. So with nothing but time to kill before I could make some noise, I treated myself to three screwdrivers using Shakers rye vodka. A shot of that in a half pint of orange juice; pleasant and not at all overwhelming. I had shit I needed to do today.
As the morning wore on, the tune I had in my head for the past forty eight hours was nagging me so I started working on that:

Of course, there are other parts, but that's the basic bass line I started with. I worked on refining the guitar part and then I sat down to program the drums. I'm about 50% happy with them; I'm beginning to notice a trend where I'm doing little trr-pa-trr-pa-trr-pa rolls with the snare and toms when I've been using ¾ time lately, like so:

That song was already cool, I don't need to redo it. (Even if the trr-pa-trr-pa-trr-pas are pretty cool sounding.)
Meanwhile, over in the maternity ward...*
I don't know if I mentioned it earlier this week or not, but the day after it hit 103°F, the inner tube on my front tire deflated. So I took it down to the BP about three blocks away to fill it back up only to find that it wouldn't hold air. Now, I'm not exactly looking for scrap metal or broken glass to ride my bike over, so I figure that the heat had caused it to swell and burst. So, today, I dragged the boss's son's wife's bike out of storage (a nice Raleigh twenty one speed with great brakes that practically floats along the pavement... but can't take a bump for shit) and rode over to Flanders Brothers on 27th and Lyndale to pick up a six and a half dollar inner tube.
Then came the hard part: Replacing the inner tube with absolutely zero foreknowledge of how to complete the procedure.
After tearing the old fucker out and then wondering how the I could be so stymied as to how to put the new one - I swear to fuck and back that my thought process went, It's a circle that goes on a circle, why is this so fucking difficult!? - I finally got the inner tube on and then after that came the tire - Why is putting a circle on two other circles this fucking hard!?
I then walked the whole shit apparatus over to the BP, careful to make sure contact between the deflated front and the ground was at a minimum, and popped three quarters into the air pump.
The inner tube inflated alright: It pushed the tire right off the wheel.
After a couple of customary 'son of a bitch's and 'motherfucker's, I deflated the inner tube and pushed the tire back on and restarted.
Now the motherfucker was crooked and I was obligated by the gods of bicycling and maintenance and repair to cuss some more while deflating the bastard and doing what seemed to me like balancing or calibrating or whatever: Squeezing the shit out of it all around until it looked right.
I filled the tire again and, happy enough with the results, I got out the ratchet set that Little John gave me before he departed for Cali last time to readjust my front brakes to a workable position so I could ride the bike home, hoping the three blocks would help to even out the tire, where I could have a proper sit down and do the trial and error thing with the world's shittiest braking mechanism ever designed and do test runs in the back lot.
Satisfied (for the time being) with the brakes, I took a spin over to the Wedge to pick up some fresh cilantro so I could get back to one of my favorite past times: Making salsa. My batch of spicy tangerine salsa was a bit of a hit (between the two people who had it, those two people being Georgie and myself) and I'm wondering if I can pull off a pear salsa.
I also picked up fresh oregano - there's nothing as potent or as tasty as fresh oregano - and thyme - fresh thyme makes all of the difference in a hardy marinara - and some of the biggest, most beautiful bulbs of garlic you'll ever find in your life - because I'll be damned if I get attacked by vampires. Seriously. The garlic bulbs over at the Wedge are overwhelming in size and a clove out of one of those bastards is easily equal to two or three cloves of the cheap bulbs I get from Aldi. The bill came out to eight and a half bucks. You pay for quality, son.
Speaking of Aldi, I almost went today. But I knew I was running late on getting a post up.
Actually, no. I was just tired and I wanted to go to the liquor store.

* I'll give you three guesses as to what song that's from and the first two don't count.

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