23 June, 2009

The Record Cover Game









Rules:

1 - Go to Wikipedia.com Hit “random”
or click http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Quotations Page.com and select "random quotations"
or click http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very last quote on the page is the title of your first album.

3 - Go to Flickr.com and click on “explore the last seven days”
or click http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use Photoshop or similar to put it all together.

This is probably the only Facebook meme I actually dig, which you can probably tell by that I've done six of these things. Please note that there are indeed two copies of François Renaud's Newer and Richer Experience LP. The first one has the pigeon* which is completely kosher by the rules of the game. But when I saw it, I wondered, "What in fuck am I supposed to do with a pigeon?"*
So I went with the seventh picture, which looked a little more fitting, but then I figured I should follow the rules and go back to the third picture: The pigeon.* But I like them both, so we now have the orignal cover art and the "alternate cover", the one that was available only through French and Italian import distributors in the seventies.

You know how there's an asterisk there? Here's why. All the way from Wednesday, April 25th, 2007, enjoy this classic post...
I'm walking to work, and across the street from work is this yuppie luncheon bar, Bambino's (side note: they cannot make a "wrap" to save their fucking lives; -.). Note: That is not a smiley, that's from back in the day when I used simple "+"s and "-"s to rate things. You guys know I don't do that smiley bullshit. There's this guy standing outside of Bambino's and...
Well, you know how people use newspaper as fish-wrap, sometimes? Yeah, that's kind of where I'm going with this, except this guy was unwrapping a fucking pigeon.
As god if there is one is my witness, this guy was unwrapping a fucking pigeon. 0850CST, corner of Hennepin and 5th St S, this guy is standing at a fucking patio table unwrapping a dead pigeon from a bunch of newspaper and starts spreading the feathers on its wings.
I shit you not.
Was he going to eat it?
Was he going to stuff it?
He wouldn't dare fuck it, would he?
What the hell was this guy doing with a wrapped-up-ass dead pigeon in the first place? Where did he get it? Did he kill it? Did he wrap it? Did somebody give it to him, and if so, why was he handling it? Is that like his fucking job or something? Why on god's green earth did that guy have a dead pigeon?
And NO! He was not a bum. Repeat: NOT A BUM. He was dressed like a completely normal person in semi-business atire. Middle-aged white guy in jeans and a dress shirt, clean shaven, wearing a suede jacket, standing there in broad daylight in the middle of downtown MiniApples, playing around with a dead fucking pigeon.
Maybe he was one of these guys: Weirdos.
And the even weirder thing is that I type the words "dead fucking pigeon" into the google image search engine and I get this:

Note: In the original post, this picture was of the cover of The Louvin Brother's Satan Is Real LP. Today, I re-Googled "dead fucking pigeon" and this was the first pic to pop up.
Which, all things aside, is mighty entertaining, but, I mean hating pigeons is nothing new, but carrying them around in a news paper?
Fucking weirdo.

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